A hysterical person it is not recommended to leave alone with your emotions... This can lead to the onset of depression, which can later be overcome only with the help of special sedatives.
It should also be calmed down in strict accordance with the recommendations of professional psychologists. Otherwise, the unstable condition may worsen.
How to calm a person at a distance and what should be considered?
You can calm a hysterical person not only by being close to him, but also at a distance.
This can be done in several ways:
| A way to calm a person | Short description |
| Clarifying questions about the emotional state | This method is most effective in situations where you need to calm down a girl. Here, the following questions will be appropriate: “Tell us how you feel now?”, “Do you want to talk about what upset / angry you” and so on. When a person is distracted to formulate an answer to the question posed, the focus of his attention will also shift, which means that emotions will become under control. |
| Recognizing the problem | For a person who cannot cope with his emotions, it is important to hear that his problem is not fictitious, but real, requiring attention. Realizing that he has someone to share his feelings with, it will be easier to stabilize his psychological state. |
| Words of support | When calming a person, it is not recommended to ask him to restrain emotions, as this can increase emotional stress, as well as provoke the development of a depressive state. Better to cheer him up, focusing on the fact that his reaction to external stimuli is normal and that what is happening to him now will end very soon and everything will be fine. |
When choosing tactics in dealing with an emotionally overexcited person, it is necessary to consider:
- how close communication is between him and the one who is trying to calm him down;
- in what environment the person is now;
- features of his temperament (for example, some people need to cry out to someone, giving free rein to emotions, while others, on the contrary, need to be alone).
What shouldn't be said to comfort a person?
In order to console a person, to provide him with psychological assistance at a turning point for him, it is important to choose your words carefully.
It is not recommended to use phrases:
| Phrases to calm a person | Short description |
| "I understand you" | These words provoke internal rejection in a person who is in hysterics. He thinks or says at such a moment: “No, you don’t understand!”, After which he abstracts from the words of support later spoken to him, concentrating even more on his negative emotions. At the moment of emotional tension, a person wants to speak out, talk about what is happening in his soul, and not listen to examples of the negative experience of outsiders who assure that they experienced similar emotions at that moment. |
| "Calm down!" | At the moment of hysteria, this phrase is perceived by a person as a prohibition on living negative emotions. He may and would like to calm down on his own, but emotions at a particular moment in time are so strong that he cannot cope with them. With a high probability, he, therefore, blames himself for weakness, since the absolute majority of adults have been shown in every possible way since childhood that it is necessary to hide their emotions from others. |
| "Stay strong!" | This phrase also belongs to the group of prohibitions on the expression of negative emotions. Its peculiarity is also that, pronouncing such words, the author demonstrates selfishness, prompting the other person to calm down, since he himself cannot withstand these emotions. |
| "Everything will be fine!" | These words devalue the experiences of a person who is hysterical. If, apart from this phrase, there is nothing more to say, it is better to just shut up and listen to your opponent. |
How should you behave?
It will be possible to calm down a person in hysterics faster if at the same time control the key moments of their behavior.
Safety engineering
When trying to support a stranger who is at the peak of emotional stress, it is recommended to follow the simplest safety measures:
- you should not come close to him, regardless of whether he has something in his hands, and in what place the events are taking place (a person, succumbing to emotions, or misperceiving the opponent's intentions, may begin to aggressively address him and even inflict physical damage);
- if a person in hysterics is on the verge of committing suicide, you should not try to support him on your own instead of calling a special psychological help service (professional psychologists will be able to quickly find an approach and correct the situation in a timely manner).
Preventive measures
To minimize the risk of a peak in emotional state in a person who, for example, has a close relative died in the recent past, a number of preventive measures can be taken:
- monitor the increasing emotional stress (as soon as a person begins to overreact emotionally to what is happening, he should be made an appointment with a psychologist to help change the vector of thinking);
- try to artificially shift the focus of attention from negative to positive events (it is important to do this naturally and unobtrusively);
- Demonstrate in every possible way their willingness to both help with deeds and support psychologically (a person, realizing that he has support, is less likely to fall into depression, since he will understand that he has someone to share difficulties with).
Psychological assistance rules
The most significant rules for providing psychological assistance are:
- first of all, it is necessary to offer the person a glass of cool water (the liquid not only has a positive effect on the state of the nervous system, but also distracts the person from negative emotions, transferring part of the attention to physical sensations);
- give a person in hysterics the opportunity to cry, regardless of what gender he is and where the situation occurs (this way it will be possible to relieve some of the emotional stress);
- if a person refuses to accept help, and his behavior resembles an acute psychosis, it is necessary to call an ambulance or a special service that provides psychological support as soon as possible;
- one should not be persistent in showing support (a person may not be ready at a particular moment to share the cause of the hysteria, he just needs to be given the opportunity to cry and get rid of some of the negativity).
Phrases and ways to calm down a person at a distance by phone, in correspondence
You can calm a person in hysterics with the help of correctly chosen words. What they will be depends on how close the communication is, under what circumstances you have to provide support.
For a sick person
A person who has recently learned that he is sick can say:
| Phrase | a brief description of |
| You know, everything is possible in our life, and often something happens that defies any explanation. There have been cases where people have been healed through positive thinking. Above the nose, I'm near. | Such words of support are suitable if the task is to reassure a close relative or friend. For a stranger, this phrase can cause reverse emotions due to a violation of personal space. |
| Probably now it seems to you that everything is bad, and there is no need to wait for changes. But I assure you that the day will come when you will remember this to everyone as a terrible dream. Together we will do everything to make the disease go away. | A universal phrase that demonstrates a willingness to help a person in any situation. |
| I believe that you have been given this test to cope with and temper. Remember that you have relatives next to you. I sincerely wish you to get better as soon as possible. | These words of support can be said to a person if the communication with him is not close, but rather formal (for example, a colleague). |
For a man, a boy
For men, in moments of emotional tension, it is important to hear that they are accepted and loved by everyone, no matter what:
| Phrase | a brief description of |
| Despite all the difficulties that you and I have to overcome, I want you to know that I will always be with you. No circumstance can affect my love for you. | These words of support are most appropriate to address a boyfriend or husband. Regardless of what his problems are associated with (work, relationships with friends or family), a man will feel the strength to move on, knowing that next to him is his faithful companion. |
| If I can help you with something, just let me know. You are a very good person and a professional in your field. I am sure that this situation will temper you and make you even more qualified than you are now. | This phrase is relevant in situations where you need to provide support to a male colleague. |
| You are very strong, I always admire that. That is why I know for sure that you can easily get out of this situation beautifully. Listen to yourself and remember that you can always count on me. | A phrase that focuses a man's attention on the woman's recognition of his strength, on a subconscious level, will inspire him to resolve the issues that have arisen. |
For a girl, a woman
Girls are easiest to calm down by being with them. The most effective way to bring a woman out of hysteria is tactile contact (hug, kiss, pat on the head, and so on).
If there is no way to support a girl using sign language, you can use the following phrases:
| Phrase | a brief description of |
| I love you very much. I would gladly take all your negative emotions to help get through this grief as soon as possible. But, unfortunately, the only thing I can do now is to be there. | In moments of emotional tension, it is important for a girl to hear that there is a person next to her who is stronger than her. |
| Trust me. I will do everything to make you feel good. | A woman is always looking for a partner (this applies to both friendly and love relationships) a man who can save her from minor troubles that complicate her life. |
What to say to a person whose loved one died?
For people who have lost a loved one, the support of others is very important.
In this case, the words should be chosen so that they do not remind once again about what happened:
| Phrase | a brief description of |
| Please accept my sincere condolences! Strength to you to be able to survive this grief. Know that if you want to talk, you can contact me at any time. | In moments when a person is worried about the loss of a loved one, there is no need to try to bring him to a conversation. It is enough to simply indicate a willingness to listen and, if necessary, be there for support. |
| Strength to you! I understand that the emotions of loss cannot be drowned out by words of consolation.But you need to try so that the memory of him (her) was filled only with warm feelings. It is not in our power to avoid death, but I am almost sure that this is not the end point. You know that he (she) would not at all want your days to be filled with tears and sadness. | A universal option that can be used both, if necessary, to support a loved one and a colleague with whom only formal relations are maintained. |
How to deal with child hysteria?
Tantrum without reason most often occurs in children. A growing person can fall into such a state, both because of physical ailments (babies do not distinguish between physical and psychological discomfort), and because of the lack of attention to their person from the parents.
You can calm the child using phrases:
| Phrase | a brief description of |
| You are upset. And that's okay. We all need to let our emotions out. | Such words help the child to identify their emotions, and also indicate the need to experience them, and not suppress them within themselves. |
| I can hear you baby. I am with you, I will be there. | This phrase makes the child understand that the parents will accept him by anyone, regardless of whether he is angry or laughing. |
| It's completely normal for you to be angry. It's not good when you fight or lie down on the floor in a store (an unacceptable action must be chosen based on its relevance for a particular child). | With the help of such an appeal, parents will be able to shift the focus of the baby's attention from negative emotions to specific behavior, after which it will be easier for him to calm down. |
How to calm an older person?
The algorithm for providing support to an elderly person is similar to the sequence of actions recommended for lifting a child out of depression.
The words will be effective here:
| Phrase | a brief description of |
| Yes, I perfectly understand your emotions - you ... (angry, upset, and so on). But what could you do? | These words will be appropriate when an older person has a tantrum due to a particular event in his life. They not only make it clear that loved ones are nearby, but also reassure, assuring that a specific person could not influence the situation. |
| Repeat the words spoken by the person, then naming the emotion. For example, “Yes, you cried. You were sad from powerlessness, this is normal. " | This "mirroring" technique is appropriate to use in any situation that requires the withdrawal of an elderly person from hysteria, regardless of the degree of closeness with him. |
How to cheer up a person before surgery?
To support the person before the operation, it is not recommended to pronounce words that destroy his feelings.
Even if the upcoming operation is not a major surgical intervention, worrying about the subsequent recovery is absolutely normal.
To convey this idea, you can use the phrases:
| Phrase | a brief description of |
| I have always admired your resilience and your ability to cope with life's difficulties. I'm sure you can handle it this time too! | Such words focus a person's attention not on negative emotions, but on the internal strength of the body to cope with difficulties (including surgery). |
| It's okay to be afraid, but your fears are groundless right now. When you recover from anesthesia, I promise that I will be by your side. | These words will give the person preparing for the operation the confidence that everything will be successful, which means that he has no reason to worry too much. |
How to help a person overcome a tantrum after a breakup?
To help a person overcome a tantrum after a breakup, one should not say to him the primitive words that people usually hear from the heroes of the film:
| Phrase | a brief description of |
| Yes, you loved him, I saw it, and everyone around you understood. It’s very unfair that he did that.But God does not give us difficulties that we could not cope with. You will become stronger. Everything will be fine. | These words can be used to support girls of all ages, regardless of the degree of intimacy with them. This kind of support will help them shift their focus from negative to positive, which will affect their emotional state. |
| You should not look for a meeting with her and cherish the memories of your relationship. You deserve to be considerate, grateful and treated. If I can help you somehow, just tell me. | Such a phrase will draw the attention of a person in hysterics to his positive character traits and the fact that he deserves more in life. |
How to help a person in an emergency situation?
In extreme circumstances, it is not recommended to intervene in the resolution of a stressful situation. If possible, it is best to turn to specialists who provide psychological assistance to those who need it.
A person who is in hysterics, regardless of what caused it, needs to be reassured. Although it’s very easy at first glance, it’s important to choose the words you use carefully. Otherwise, you can not only not help, but also aggravate the situation, driving the person into deep depression.
Video on how to calm a hysterical person
A simple algorithm for how to calm a person: